Football questions, a bit embarrassed to ask...

[Syn_13]

Not many better memories than the lunchtime games of wembley singles. Wish I was 13 again

Used to love playing Wembley and 60 seconds as a kid.

 

[thinktank]

3) What is a "false number 9"

Emile Heskey.

 

[HailKingLevy]

Where is Goalie when needed . otherwise known as Goalie when . ?

 

[Col_M]

Why don't they call it that? A ball isn't square. How about instead of saying "square ball" they juz say "cube"? Will that work?

In theory this is the PhsycoBabble that AVB uses according to the rags.

 

[montylynch]

Why is a 'nutmeg' called a nutmeg ?

Doesn't goalie when mean that anybody can go in goal ?

 

[Geyzer Soze]

A rush goalie is a classic childhood football rule used in the casual kickabout, where usually nobody wants to play in goal. Each team can nominate a goalie who can obviously handle the ball as normal, but at any time they can run up the other end of the pitch to join an attack and another team mate will take on the goalkeeping duties until they fancy playing outfield and swap with someone else. In theory you have one goalie at a time, but nobody is forced to stay in goal the whole game. It's as synonymous with my childhood football memories as jumpers for goalposts.

I'm not sure where you'd have heard that in commentary though - it might have been more in reference to a 'sweeper keeper' like Lloris who likes to rush off his line to clear up loose balls behind a high defensive line.

Possibly from the famous "modric no like chicken badge' Meme-thingy .... (where the Rush goalie thing presumably referred to Gomes)

 

[Col_M]

Why is a 'nutmeg' called a nutmeg ?

Doesn't goalie when mean that anybody can go in goal ?

Goalie is short for Goalkeeper and normally you only have 1

Rush Goalie is effectively whoever is closest to making a save

 

[talkshowhost86]

Isn't a false 9 when you sleep with a girl who you think is a stunner, but when you sober up in the morning you realise she was actually just a 3?

I think 'playing between the lines' fits into this analogy somewhere as well.

 

[Lilbaz]

Isn't a false 9 when you sleep with a girl who you think is a stunner, but when you sober up in the morning you realise she was actually just a 3?

I think 'playing between the lines' fits into this analogy somewhere as well.

Playing between the lines is when a charlie whore gives you a blow job.

 

[hoodlum]

In my experience a false 9 is a girl who leads you into thinking you have a shot at 69'ing her, but it really just leads to spooning and cuddling (66).

 

[JimmyG2]

Thanks guys for the answers, especially about the rush, stick, spider, & monkey goalies.

They had a separate playground for the older boys in my primary school, so I had to play rounders with the girls.

That used to be a punishment at my primary school.
'JimmyG2 either go in goal or go and play rounders with the girls you silly boy'.
Until they realised that after a certain age, it was a highly sought after outcome
and just asking for even more trouble.

 

[Rocksuperstar]

Not many better memories than the lunchtime games of wembley singles. Wish I was 13 again

Headers & Volleys or 3 & In were the two popular ones in my area. Oh, and there was a game that involved the rush keeper being fair game and impossible to foul, so we'd kick chunks out of him until he was back in his area.

Just stumbled across this though, which made me smile

http://www.bone.me.uk/playground-football-rulebook.php

 

[Gbspurs]

Headers & Volleys or 3 & In were the two popular ones in my area. Oh, and there was a game that involved the rush keeper being fair game and impossible to foul, so we'd kick chunks out of him until he was back in his area.

Just stumbled across this though, which made me smile

http://www.bone.me.uk/playground-football-rulebook.php

Thanks for the link. A few genuinely laugh out loud moments there which are exactly what I remember. Namely these:

"In games on large open spaces, the length of the pitch is obviously denoted by the jacket piles, but the width is a variable. In the absence of roads, water hazards or "a big dug", the width is determined by how far out the attacking winger has to meander before the pursuing defender gets fed up and lets him head back towards where the rest of the players are waiting, often as far as quarter of a mile away."

"The "Tube". Genuine leather ball, identifiable by brown all-over colouring. Was once black and white, before ravages of games on concrete, but owners can never remember when. Adored by everybody, especially keepers. Advantages: feels good, easily controlled, makes a satisfying "whump" noise when you kick it. Disadvantages: turns into medicine ball when wet, smells like a dead dog"

Brilliant.

 

[Col_M]

Ha ha The Dug. I remember that technique but never knew it had a name.

 

[tiger666]

Why do coaches, staff etc have their initials on their clothes?

 

[nightgoat]

That used to be a punishment at my primary school.
'JimmyG2 either go in goal or go and play rounders with the girls you silly boy'.
Until they realised that after a certain age, it was a highly sought after outcome
and just asking for even more trouble.

Ah, I loved playing tennis with the girls by year 10...

 

[SargeantMeatCurtains]

7. Bearing in mind that Jamie Derpknapp scores quite highly on a scale of 1 to potato, why does he get his own sky show on a saturday evening?