- Feb 1, 2005
- 55,626
- 205,418
- Admin
- #1
Well here we go! One more day!
It is widely believed that the very first ITK was a man known as Judas Iscariot, who, as their handbook would have you believe, bubbled up Jesus by identifying him with a kiss. Modern day ITK's might well like to remember that Judas didn't come to a happy end, although it is rumoured that a distant relative of Daniel Levy haggled on the 30 pieces of silver.
After this ITK developed through the ages. In Roman times, ITK was given by public announcers in market squares, a tradition which continued for hundred of years. In fact King Richard IV once received some ITK famously proclaimed 'I Like not this message' and promptly had the poor Herald who brought the message shot by bow and arrow, given rise to the phrase, 'don't shoot the messenger'.
In 1745 an unknown ITK posted a parchment in the church noticeboard in the village of Upper Appleby that the villages best morris dancer, Josiah Felchalot had signed for local rivals Lower Appleby.
In 1815, the Battle of Waterloo might have taken a different turn if Napoleon had not ignored ITK telling of British troop movements, claiming that the information was 'unverified'.
By the 20th century, ITK was advancing in leaps and bounds. During the Great War, pigeons were used to carry ITK and during WWII Lord Haw Haw became the first radio ITK, which was bad for him as in a break with tradition, he ended up being shot.
The Cold War saw a new breed of ITK, the sneaky spying ITK as people turned traitor to pass secrets on to the Russians, probably the lowest point of ITK, which resulted in ITK's getting a bad reputation which took a long time to live down.
The early 70's saw the emergence of possibly the greatest ITK of all time, a shadowy figure known only as 'Deepthroat', whose ITK was directly responsible for bringing about the Watergate scandal. Deepthroat is still revered and often referred to in popular culture. He truly was the colonel of ITK.
The 80's saw ITK's receive a mixed reception, adored by the authoroties, vilified by villlains, they were known by the term 'supergrass'. Being ITK in the 80's carried an aura of mystique and edginess.
Surprisingly, ITK probably reached an all time low in the 90's as technology made huge advances, a barren period for ITK and probably for the only time ever, a woman achieved the hallowed status of ITK when Monica Lewinsky gave President Clinton a blowie and made a fortune from bubbling.
Today, ITK is concentrated more on football, with almost everyone having a nan at the airport, a friend who works in Hatton Garden or a cousin who works in the city. The mobile phone, facebook and twitter. Ugh.
Info is passed through several hands and what might start as information saying Spurs are interested in Moutinho gets passed from one person, on to another and then another until it finally makes its way onto SC as 'Moutinho.....done deal'.
So remember, ITK has a long, chequered history and a very murky past. It has had some stunning successes, but for every success story there are many failures and today's ITK's are under the spotlight like never before. Cryptics, Typos, Misunderstandings................Where would we be if Monica Lewinsky never gave Bill Clinton a nosh? Worse, if Napoleon hadn't insisted on ignoring 'unverified' ITK? I tell you where........We'd be French and American Presidents would be shafting all and sundry, now we're used to the one but who wants to be French?
Right, sadly, i've got work to do......
Thought for the day: It is often said that we should never judge a book by its cover...
However, if the cover barely encases the book, I think its safe to assume that book is an attention seeking slag.
