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The next page on KUMBRe: January 2015 Transfer Window - News & Rumours
by Dyer's Leg on Tue Feb 03, 2015 9:10 am
I would imagine it went some thing like this:
5:00 PM
Mr Levy Sir, I have a call for you. You're never going to guess who it is..."
DL: "Ok, put them through"
DS: "Daniel, Hi, it's Dave. How's things? That stadium malarkey and reporting you and your investigators to the police. Yeah, sorry about that. I hope you can understand'
DL: "What do you want?"
DS: "Erm, well, you know you don't want Adabeyor? I will take him off of your hands"
DL Rubs hands together with glee
DL: "On what terms?"
DS: "We will take him off you if you pay all of his wages, and I will tell Karren to stop saying horrible things about you in her Sun column."
DL spits out his coffee, and places one hand over the mouth piece. In the direction of his PA he mouths 'Is this c*nt for real?'
DL: "So you want us to loan us a player with an almost 1 in 2 goal record, that is on 100 big ones a week for nothing?"
DS: "Yeah, what's the problem with that?"
DL face palms and checks his watch to see if it's time for Home & Away yet
DL: "Sure Dave, I can't see a problem with that"
Little DS does a jig around the West Ham boardroom.
DL: "I will send him to the ground now so you can sort things out - I will give you a bell later to see how you're getting on."
DL Sniggers and puts the phone down
9:00 PM
"Mr Levy, it's that funny little man on the telephone for you again"
DL: "Hello"
DS: "Daniel, it's Dave again. We've got your man here and he wants to sign."
DL: "Bwahahahahahahaha. You soppy little sh*te, did you honestly think we would let you have him and we pay for it? Really? Bwhahahahahaha"
DS: "But, but....you said yes, and we've blown out everyone else now"
DL: "I've got to go Dave, I've just pissed myself and given myself a hernia through laughing so much"
........I so hope that's how it played out!
Now the silly window is over here is what we should look at in the summer: if we keep most of the squad as it is this lot would be decent additions
Gk Lindegaard From UTD
CB Cahill From Chelsea
CB Lad from Genk / Micha Richards
RB Jenkinson From Arsenal
Striker ?????????
By Martin Lipton on Kicca
"That West ham January transfer window striker story in full: failed to sign Remy because of FIFA rules; failed to re-engage Zarate because of PL rules; failed to offload a player they have already released twice (Cole); failed to sign a striker the other club doesn't want (Adebayor); failed to sign a striker who wanted to come (Gomis) and now facing being booted out of the FA Cup over the striker they kept (Sakho). David Gold and David Sullivan, stand forward and take a bow."