What's new

The Daily ITK Discussion Thread 21st May

Status
Not open for further replies.

Archibald&Crooks

Aegina Expat
Admin
Feb 1, 2005
55,533
204,721
index.php

Morning all

I split up with the Mrs last night. She said I think about football more than i think about her.

I was devastated , I've been with her 6 seasons

Here's a thread for today's ITK.

Just to mix it up a little we turn the clock back a few years to bring you a repeat of the Daily Thread at a time where discontent was rife. Well, its rife all the time but you know what I mean.



index.php



Two hundred and twenty five……..Two hundred and twenty six,……Two hundred and……suddenly the door to his office opened. Daniel Levy leapt to his feet, doing up his flies in a hurry as Joe Lewis burst in. "What are you doing?" Lewis asked. "I was counting my hairs" said Levy. Joe Lewis laughed "But you're as bald as a babies arse, I can tell you right now how many hairs you got shorty, fucking none"

Levy blushed. Why was it Lewis always made him feel uncomfortable? "No" Levy replied, I was counting the hairs on my nutsack. Lewis looked at him, bolt eyed. Levy went on "At the end of every season I send the BSoDL a card thanking them for their support and I sellotape a single pube to each card"

"What the fuck for?" Asked Lewis

"DNA testing. Gotta make sure my bastard sons are genuine" said Levy "Plus one or two of them get a thrill out of it. A Levyhair is a rare thing, a collectable"

Lewis sat down. "These bastard sons of yours………just how loyal are they?"

Levy smiled. "Unswerving, total and utter devotion. They could come home from work and find me getting stuck across their wives and they'd kick her for not baking me a cake……why do you ask?"

Lewis leant back in his chair, put his hands behind his head and smiled. "They might come in useful when you hear this"…….He went on….."We're cancelling the new stadium. I've decided we can play at the New River sports complex near Wood Green"

Levy sat bolt upright. Well, as upright as a dwarf can get, to be honest, its sometimes difficult to tell. He might have been standing. After about thirty seconds he regained the power of speech……..

"There's no way, no fucking way that I can sell that"

Lewis smiled. "Sure you can, you've got the gift of the gab and you have the BSoDL on your side, you said it yourself…..all you have to do is come up with a half decent reason"

Levy simply sat there (or stood, we still don't know). He couldn't believe his ears. Suddenly he emitted a high pitched shriek which was only heard by several dogs within a half mile radius and launched himself across the desk at Lewis. For several seconds they wrestled on the floor, locked in a vice-like death grip. Lewis picked Levy up by the scruff of his neck and drop kicked him across the office, Levy hit the wall, tumbled down it, sprang to his feet and threw himself at Lewis again. All you could hear was a primitive animal like snarling as Levy hissed and scratched at Lewis. Finally, Levy's strength gave way and he collapsed into Lewis' arms sobbing.

"There there Danny, there there" he said soothingly as he stroked his cheek. "Give it to me Uncle Joe, give it to me now" whispered Levy. Lewis smiled and reached into his jacket pocket.

"Here you go" said Lewis as he handed over the envelope, "Here's your 500k pay rise"

Levy's eyes glazed over as he took the envelope "what about the ground?" he asked

"Naaaah" said Lewis, I was only yanking your chain.

"You're a ****" said Levy

Lewis leaned back in his chair and lit the fattest cigar the world has ever seen, puffed on it several times and blew smoke rings into Levys face.

"I know son, I know"………..You nosey ****, I bet I catch at least twenty of you. ****s!

Suddenly, from the direction of the pitch singing could be heard

I'm Bee Ess oh Dee Ell
I'm Bee Ess oh Dee Ell
I know I am, i'm sure I am
I'm Bee Ess oh Dee Ell

Lewis and Levy stood and went to the window to watch as Levy's sons gathered to serenade him. "See?" said Lewis……"with devotion like that you can get away with anything"

Levy smiled as a warm glow of affection and pride swept over him. "I think you're right" he said…..

Lewis blew one final smoke ring which hovered exactly above Levy's head before turning magically into a pound sign.

"I'm glad you think so" he said as he put his jacket on. "We're selling Harry Kane"…..Levy turned sharply, but Lewis was gone, the door slowly closing shut. All he could hear was laughter fading into the distance.

Levy turned back to the serenading and mumbled one word. ****!

That's all folks.

PS: Oh and before some clever **** says images aren't allowed in this thread, that rule only applies to you peasants. This is about the second time I've posted an image in over 10 years. Deal with it :D

PPS: Please don't highlight this post to check for hidden info, you'd be wasting your time

Now that's really all. Keep it ITK.
 

DaiT

Well-Known Member
Jan 29, 2011
374
698
Its very early over there for you to be posting.
Good news re GB & Danny.
Have we a had a pledgeathon yet?
I will donate 100 quid if my countryman (GB) re-signs for us.
 

doctor stefan Freud

the tired tread of sad biology
Sep 2, 2013
15,170
72,169
Things got a bit nutty last night; would really appreciate it if you could hold off any itk until about six this evening. Got lots to do, and any events bordering on The Rapture today could really derail my plans. Cheers
 
Last edited:

Hoopspur

You have insufficient privileges to reply here!
Jun 28, 2012
6,332
9,703
I can understand Victor not being happy. Can’t really play him and Dier in the same team, and they’re first team players. IF we’re interested in Wilmar (whatever) then that puts that issue onto the back burner for another season.
 

Japhet

Well-Known Member
Aug 30, 2010
19,232
57,392
Would hate (HATE) to lose Victor. Not had the best season but hasn't been long back from injury and is an absolute monster when on form. Please NO!
 

ernest_lowrider

Well-Known Member
May 31, 2012
479
2,119
I love big Vic and I think he's a phenomenal player, but after night-long consideration I think I will be happy if we sell him - because it will mean something really really crazy is going to happen, transfer of player who can bring us to the next level. Selling him without signing some marquee player for his money just doesn't make sense.
 

cider spurs

Well-Known Member
Jul 5, 2016
9,399
23,731
If Rose can get back to his pre-injury best, then I'd love him to stay.

Not going to go over 'that interview' again, instead hoping we can get the little chap back to his tenacious best.

Apart from obvious strengthening, the less upheaval the better.
 

yido_number1

He'll always be magic
Jun 8, 2004
8,646
16,809
Sounds like a big risk to lose too much of our CM grouping. I would have thought it would be an evolution rather than revolution. Hoping Rose does stay as we won't be able to replace him with equal quality and when fired up he is some player!
 

Riandor

COB Founder
May 26, 2004
9,414
11,621
In Poch we trust.
This.
VW was a player that Poch signed twice (Southampton, Spurs), so if Poch has sanctioned his departure (at the right price), then there must be a very good reason. Either fitness, or the fact that Poch is changing his CDM options.
 

$hoguN

Well-Known Member
Jul 25, 2005
26,626
34,700
Sounds like a big risk to lose too much of our CM grouping. I would have thought it would be an evolution rather than revolution. Hoping Rose does stay as we won't be able to replace him with equal quality and when fired up he is some player!
We looked stale for large parts of last season. Sometimes revolution can be the right call
 

bubble07

Well-Known Member
Dec 27, 2004
22,959
29,896
If Rose can get back to his pre-injury best, then I'd love him to stay.

Not going to go over 'that interview' again, instead hoping we can get the little chap back to his tenacious best.

Apart from obvious strengthening, the less upheaval the better.

But you sort of have
 

TEESSIDE1

Married, new job and Spurs on the up!
Jul 3, 2006
15,089
18,780
Would hate (HATE) to lose Victor. Not had the best season but hasn't been long back from injury and is an absolute monster when on form. Please NO!

It’s a strange one given he was outstanding in 2016/17. I can only think it’s a case of he expects to play every week, or Poch is looking to change the dynamics of the team. I love Vic and would play him over Dier but I wonder if Poch is wanting someone more in the mould of Fernandinho at City, an athletic player whom can both shield and pass the ball competently.
 

PT

North Stand behind Pat's goal.
Admin
May 21, 2004
25,468
2,408
So far as any real intel on Bale is concerned, I would guess it’ll hold till after the UCL Final.
 

allatsea

Well-Known Member
Aug 31, 2012
8,866
16,054
Sounds like a big risk to lose too much of our CM grouping. I would have thought it would be an evolution rather than revolution. Hoping Rose does stay as we won't be able to replace him with equal quality and when fired up he is some player!

Obviously chosen to keep Dier and Winks and attempting to bring in two CMs. If he can get in the two CMs he wants then Wanyama and Dembele will be allowed to go. I guess Poch sees what we see and wants CMs who can attack more and pass more effectively more often.
 

bubble07

Well-Known Member
Dec 27, 2004
22,959
29,896
Obviously chosen to keep Dier and Winks and attempting to bring in two CMs. If he can get in the two CMs he wants then Wanyama and Dembele will be allowed to go. I guess Poch sees what we see and wants CMs who can attack more and pass more effectively more often.

Will require huge investment to improve on wanyama. Poch really is a ruthless mofo
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top